Bundle of Joy

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In case you missed it:

That's right!  We are expecting baby #3 Christmas day!

For some reason this has been a really hard post for me to write.  I have written and rewritten this post in my head at least a hundred times, but whenever I get to the computer, I just draw a blank.  

First off, we are excited! When we made the decision to have another baby, it was done with much thought and prayer.  We did not go into this lightly, knowing how complicated another baby would make things with Kai.  I think the clincher was one day when Zuri was wanting attention and J was taking care of Kai while I was getting dinner ready.  We had already been contemplating another baby, but I just couldn't wrap my head around the responsibility of another child.  Zuri  had become all sad and huffy.  When I asked her what was wrong, she said that she is sad because no one will play with her.  Unfortunately, that was not an isolated incident--she longs for the company of other children.  Then, later that evening after we had put Zuri down to bed, J turned to me in a really disappointed tone and said, "we aren't going to have a big family, are we?"  I knew at that moment what was missing from our family.  We knew that the decision to have another baby was the right one.

Secondly, we are nervous.  I can list a thousand things we are nervous about with the introduction of another child.  First and foremost is balancing the needs of a newborn with the needs of Kai, especially when we leave the house.  Managing two strollers?  Luckily, we have respite hours that can help with some of that need, and Zuri is big enough to help out at times as well.  Then there is always the possibility of another special needs child.  If we were to have another special needs child, we would love that baby just as much as we love Zuri and Kai--that is not even a question.  I just don't know how I would be able to physically take care of two special needs children and Zuri (for those of you who know Zuri you know how energetic and active she is--she is sometimes two or three in one!).  

So far, everything indicates a healthy, typical baby.  I am about 16 weeks, trying to eat right, exercise, and take care of myself.  My blood pressure is normal (although we do expect it to increase as my pregnancy progresses), and everything looked good on the first ultrasound/blood tests.  Between 18-20 weeks I will see some high risk specialists and get an in-depth ultrasound done as a precaution.  The baby is measuring about 4 days smaller than the date of my last period would indicate, but the doctor is keeping the due date as December 25th.  I think I may have ovulated late, because I didn't receive a positive pregnancy test until 5 days after my expected period, which would also explain the baby measuring 4 days younger.

This pregnancy has kicked my butt.  With Zuri and Kai, my first two trimesters were relatively easy.  It was the third trimester that was the hardest.  So far, I have gotten sick (as in a cold) twice, and my energy has been nearly non-existent.  I was nauseous all day through my whole first trimester, although I only threw up once.  My bladder has been working overtime and I routinely get up at least two to three times at night to go to the bathroom, which results in a loss of sleep.  I normally don't hit that phase until my last trimester.  Since entering my second trimester, my nausea has pretty much gone away, but it will still randomly hit me.  My energy has increased, but I think I took advantage of it too much and caused myself to be sick trying to get things done while I could.    

Zuri is super excited about the baby.  She is always putting her hand on my tummy and wanting to feel the baby, which at this stage she cannot do yet.  Every week I show her how big the baby is growing, and throughout the week, she will say, "the baby is this big" and show me with her hands, and say the corresponding fruit or vegetable size (ie apple).  

When we askZuri whether she wants a brother or a sister, her immediate response is a sister.  In fact, she has become rather emphatic that we are having a girl.  When I told her that the baby might be a boy, she said that she doesn't like boys.  The first time I asked her what we should name the baby, she said, "Zuri!" When I said, "but that's your name."  Her response was: "so we can be twins!"  Since then she has given me a lot of made up names.  Most memorable is Tree-on. 

J won't say, but I think he is hoping for another boy--he states that he just wants a healthy baby.  As for me, I would like another girl.  There is nothing like the bond with sisters.  According to the Chinese gender horoscope, the baby is a boy.  I have had a feeling the baby is a girl (intuition or hope?), and I was right with both Zuri and Kai.  So, we shall see!